Friday, April 4, 2014

INTERVIEW: Andrea Speed

Today we're talking to the delightful Andrea Speed who definitely has one of the most unique book concepts EVER!

Hello Andy and welcome to The Hat Party! <3 Thank you so much for subjecting yourself to the RANDOMNESS that is a Raine O'Tierney interview! Please don your best hat, and let's get started!

You have three words, describe your writing dreams.

Ubiquitous, abundant, surprising.

On a scale 1 (super chill) to 10 (falling apart at the seams) how cool are you under the pressure of blurb writing?! 

3. Which I assume is semi-conscious.

If you could go back and speak to your 13-year-old self, what would you say?

You know, running away isn't the worst idea in the world.  Ha ha! No I’m serious. You should probably go.

A genre-specific virus has attacked you, rendering you INCAPABLE of writing your chosen genre. What do you do now?!

Write in another genre. There are many. Maybe I can write my way back to it. And if not,  there’s a whole bunch of other stuff out there.

Describe yourself using song lyrics.

You want a face to forget? Well, I’m glad we met. I think I’d look nice in your lawn.

Do you think you’d fare better against feral vampires or zombies?

Zombies. Vampires can presumably think and adapt, whereas zombies are pretty damn dumb, no matter how feral they are. A dumb opponent is a preferred opponent.

You have 200 words—Make. Me. Swoon. (PLEASE!) 

The quiet and dark were absolute. Flashlights barely penetrated the gloom, and when they did, all they showed was wreckage. Something had torn through the base like a hurricane, except it was a storm capable of leaving six inch gashes in thick titanium walls.  Simmons followed a trail of blood deep into the complex, but it inexplicably came to an end in the middle of a hallway. He looked around, the blade of light barely cutting through the dark, but saw no doors, no remains, no further drops of blood. How did that work? On top of that, those weird noises continued, a clang like metal against metal somewhere deep in the base, reverberating through the corridors like it was an echo chamber. “Charlie one, what the hell is that noise?” He asked into his radio. The noise continued. Clang clang. Pause. Clang. “Charlie one, please respond.” Nothing. No reply, no static … and the noise suddenly stopped. Like someone had thrown a switch. “Charlie one?” In the absence of noise, he heard a tinier sound, one hard to immediately identify. Claws, scratching against metal, and suddenly eyes opened in the dark. Dozens upon dozens of glowing yellow eyes.

(That’s what you meany by swoon, right? Heh heh.)

What is your most irrational fear and what makes you inexplicably happy?

Sharks. I think I saw Jaws at too young an age. I know I’m unlikely to ever encounter a shark in a non-aquarium situation, but jeezum crow, I still find them a little freaky. As for happy … time by myself? Although that isn’t so inexplicable for a curmudgeonly loner, is it?

Worst mistake you’ve made in your career and what you’ve learned from it? 

Everything. I doubt I've learned anything, as I constantly bumble through things, like a stooge with a vase and a bear trap stuck to my foot.

And finally, for THE most important question of all: what kinds of dachshunds are the BEST kinds of dachshunds?

Gummi dachshunds.

~ ~ ~

After barely surviving a surprise attack by long-time enemy the Lharaz, mech pilot Takeshi is tasked with a new mission: Protect the people of Ia, and capture a live specimen of the local fauna that has been turned against them by the Lharaz, who are using Ia as a testing ground for suspected new weaponry.

The mission would be a lot easier if Ia's local fauna wasn't dinosaurs.

Available from Less Than Three Press

About the author:

Andrea Speed may or may not be the pseudonym of a collection of super-intelligent ducks plotting to take over the world. Even super-intelligence isn't enough to make up for the fact that ducks just aren't natural megalomaniacs, and really just want some good bread. She/they are the author of the Infected series, the Josh of the Damned series, and some other random stuff. Will show you the secret handshake if you bring her a two foot length of string, a picture of Patrick Stewart as the Mars Rover, and a glass of root beer.

Twitter: @aspeed

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